As a mother of four, I have experienced the difficulty and frustration of trying to get your children to listen and behave. I’ve had embarrassing scenes at the grocery store, falling to the ground in the middle of the mall trauma, and screaming “I hate you and stay away from me” while in public. I have also witnessed many other mothers and fathers dealing with the same behavior. Don’t I remember behaving like this when I was a kid? Then it hit me like a ton of bricks, my generation behaved out of fear. That goes back to a time when a father didn’t think twice about hitting his butt in public. That is not the solution either. So how do you stop bad behavior?
As I mentioned I have four children. My youngest has four. For the most part, she’s very cute and lovable, until she decides she’s big enough to take off and go exploring on her own. I’ve run madly down the sidewalk to catch it before it reaches the other side and onto the street. I have lost it in the clothing stores among the coat racks. It has run down the central aisle of the church during the gospel. I totally understand why some parents have their children tied up. I must admit that before I had children I thought it was terrible. As I get older, I am much less stubborn.
My second youngest son is eight years old, my only son. It can be quite adorable and useful. But boy, can he stomp and clench his fists and growl when he gets mad or angry? I’m glad he’s smaller than me right now. In a way, he’s still a mama’s boy. He likes to please me and will help me with the housework without being asked or paid. He fights a lot with his sisters. I don’t remember fighting so much with my brother or sister. Why do they fight so much?
Then there is my middle daughter who is ten years old. He’s a bit young for his years and still has the tantrums you’d expect from my four-year-old. In her defense, she had very little time as a baby. She was only five months old when I was pregnant with her brother. Not quite Irish twins, but close. She is very sensitive and most things make her cry. She is a bit of a gossip and instigator. She is very innocent which sometimes scares me because she trusts everyone.
My oldest daughter is twelve years old. Get upset quickly if you don’t understand something. His hormones are misplaced and he gives new meaning to the word moody. She will directly say “no” or “I will not do that” when I ask her to do something. Wow, I would have kicked my butt from one end of the hall to the other if I had responded to my mom or dad that way. Who does he think he is? Why is listening to me optional?
Does any of this sound familiar? As you can see, I have an age range that covers all the various behavior problems. I started reading a wonderful e-book that shows you how to turn bad behavior into good behavior and develop a happy new relationship with your child. I was surprised that some of the methods I was using actually made things worse! I had no idea that I was making such a big mistake! No wonder my kids were out of control!